Navigium
Lucian of Samosata (lucian-of-samosata)Navi 36 · perseus-eng3More by Lucian of Samosata (lucian-of-samosata)
Choose a text
id="mobileReaderAuthor" class="mobile-reader-author" href="/authors/lucian-of-samosata" aria-label="More works by Lucian of Samosata (lucian-of-samosata)">
—
⋯
Original / primary: Perseus Eng3
1
LYCINUS Didn’t I say that it was easier for vultures to miss a stinking corpse in the open than for Timolaus to miss an odd sight, even if he had to run off to Corinth for it without a pause for breath? You are so fond of shows, and so determined in such matters. TIMOLAUS What should I have done, then, Lycinus, having nothing to do, and hearing that such a huge boat, exceptionally large, had put into Piraeus, one of the Egyptian grain ships on its way to Italy? I fancy that you two, you and Samippus here, have come from Athens for exactly the same reason, to see the ship. LYCINUS That is so, and Adimantus of Myrrinous A deme in Attica. came along with us, but I don’t know where he is now; he has wandered off in the crowd of spectators. Until we reached the ship and went aboard, you, I think, Samippus, were in front, and then came Adimantus, and next I myself, holding on to him with both hands; he led me by the hand all the way up the gangway—I had shoes on, he was barefoot—but then I didn’t see him again either on board or when we came back to the shore.
2
SAMIPPUS Do you know at what point he left us, Lycinus? I think it was when that pretty lad came out of the hold, the one in pure white linen, with his hair tied back over both sides of his forehead. If I know Adimantus, I think that when he saw that dainty sight he bade a long farewell to the Egyptian shipwright who was showing us round the ship, and just stood there, weeping as usual. He’s quick at tears when Cupid’s about. LYCINUS Well, Samippus, the young lad didn’t seem to me very pretty, not enough to excite Adimantus at any rate. He has a crowd of beauties following him in Athens, all of them free-born, full of chatter, and breathing wrestling-schools; it wouldn’t be ignoble even to weep in their presence. This fellow is not only dark-skinned, but thick-lipped and too thin in the leg. He spoke in a slovenly manner, one long, continuous prattle; he spoke Greek, but his accent and intonation pointed to his native-land. His hair coiled in a plait behind shows he is not freeborn.
3
TIMOLAUS This is a sign of high birth in Egypt, Lycinus. All the free-born boys plait it until they come of age; it’s just the opposite to our ancestors, who thought it comely for old men to fasten up their hair in a knot, with a golden cicada-brooch to hold it. SAMIPPUS Good, Timolaus; you remind me of Thucydides, where he writes in the introduction to his work about our ancient luxury among the Ionians, when the people of that time went away to found colonies together. Thucydides I, vi.
4
LYCINUS Oh, now I remember where Adimantus left us, Samippus: when we stood a long time by the mast, looking up and counting the layers of hide, and marvelling at the sailor going up among the shrouds and then running quite safely along the yardarm up there holding on to the ropes. SAMIPPUS Good! Then what must we do now? Wait for him here? Or would you like me to go back again to the ship? TIMOLAUS Oh, no, let us go on. He has probably already passed us, rushing off to the city, when he couldn’t find us again. In any case Adimantus knows the road, and there is no danger of his going astray if we desert him. LYCINUS Isn’t it rather churlish to go off and leave a friend? But let us walk on all the same, if Samippus agrees. SAMIPPUS Certainly; we may find the gymnasium still open. Incidentally, what a huge ship!
5
5
SAMIPPUS
5
5
A hundred and twenty cubits long, the ship-wright said, and well over a quarter as wide, and from deck to bottom, where it is deepest, in the bilge, twenty-nine. Then, what a tall mast, what a yard to carry! What a fore-stay to hold it up! How gently the poop curves up, with a little golden goose below! And correspondingly at the opposite end, the prow juts right out in front, with figures of the goddess, Isis, after whom the ship is named, on either side. And the other decorations, the paintings and the topsail blazing like fire, anchors in front of them, and capstans, and windlasses, and the cabins on the poop—all very wonderful to me.
6
SAMIPPUS You could put the number of sailors at an army of soldiers. She was said to carry corn enough to feed all Attica for a year. And all this a little old man, a wee fellow, has kept from harm by turning the huge rudders with a tiny tiller. He was pointed out to me—a man with receding curly hair. Heron was his name, I believe. TIMOLAUS He was wonderful at his job, those aboard said: wiser than Proteus at things to do with the sea.
7
TIMOLAUS Did you hear how he brought the ship here, what happened to those on board, and how they were saved by a star? LYCINUS No, Timolaus, but I’d very much like to. TIMOLAUS The captain himself told me—a good man, and good company. When they left Pharos, he said, the wind was not very strong, and they sighted Acamas in seven days. Then it blew against them from the west, and they were driven abeam to Sidon. After Sidon a severe storm broke and carried them through Aulon to reach the Chelidonenses on the tenth day. There they were all nearly drowned.
8
8
TIMOLAUS
8
8
I myself have sailed by the Chelidonenses, and I know the size of the waves there, especially in a sou’westerly gale with a touch of south; this, you see, happens to be where the Pamphylian and Lycian seas divide. The swell is driven by numerous currents and is split on the headland—the rocks are knife-edged, razor-sharp at the sea’s edge. So the breakers are terrifying and make a great din, and the wave is often as high as the cliff itself.
9
TIMOLAUS This is what the captain said they found when it was still night and pitch dark. But the gods were moved by their lamentations, and showed fire from Lycia, so that they knew the place. One of the Dioscuri Castor and Pollux, guides to mariners. put a bright star St. Elmo’s Fire. on the masthead, and guided the ship in a turn to port into the open sea, just as it was driving on to the cliff. Then, having now lost their course, they sailed across the Aegean beating up with the trade winds against them, and yesterday, seventy days after leaving Egypt, they anchored in Piraeus, after being driven so far downwind. They should have kept Crete to starboard, and sailed beyond Malea so as to be in Italy by now. LYCINUS Upon my word, that’s an amazing pilot you speak of, this Heron, as old as Nereus, The old man of the sea. who went so far astray.
10
LYCINUS But what’s this? Is that not Adimantus? TIMOLAUS So it is; Adimantus himself. Let’s give him a shout, Adimantus! You! Of Myrrinous! Strombichus’s son! LYCINUS Well, either he’s annoyed with us or he’s gone deaf. It’s certainly Adimantus and no other. I see him now quite plainly—his cloak, his walk, his close-crop. Let’s put on speed, anyhow, and catch him up.
11
LYCINUS We shall have to pull you back by your cloak, Adimantus; you take no notice when we shout. You seem thoughtful, as though you’re turning over something serious and important in your mind. ADIMANTUS Nothing bothersome, Lycinus; an empty notion came into my head as I was walking along and made me deaf to your shouting, I was so wrapped up in my thoughts. LYCINUS What was it? Don’t be shy, unless it’s completely forbidden to tell it. We’ve been initiated, as you know, and learnt to hold our tongues. ADIMANTUS I’m ashamed to tell you. You will think it such a childish idea. LYCINUS Nothing to do with love, is it? You certainly won’t be telling it to the unenlightened! We too have been initiated, under a torch which was blazing! ADIMANTUS Nothing of that kind, my dear fellow. It was just a dream of wealth—what everybody calls “empty bliss and you caught me at the height of my fortune and luxury. LYCINUS Well, that’s very simple. Share your luck, as they say; bring your wealth and pool it.
12
LYCINUS His friends should enjoy their part of Adimantus’s luxury. ADIMANTUS I was separated from you as soon as we were on board, Lycinus, after bringing you there safely. I was measuring the width of the anchors when you went off somewhere.
13
13
ADIMANTUS
13
13
All the same I looked at everything and then asked one of the sailors what
13
income the ship brought in to its owner in an average year. “A minimum of twelve Attic talents,” he replied. Then I went back on shore and mused on what a happy life I should have had if of a sudden some god had made the ship mine: I would have helped my friends, and sailed in her myself some-times, and sometimes sent my servants. Then with some of the twelve talents I had already built myself a house in a good spot just above the Painted Arcade,
13
1
13
giving up the family house by the Ilissus; and I was buying servants and clothes and carriages and horses. Just now I was at sea, the envy of the passengers and the terror of the crew; they thought me almost a king. I was still settling her affairs and gazing at the harbour in the distance when you turned up, Lycinus. You sank my wealth and capsized my bark just when she was sailing well before the fair wind of my wish.
14
14
LYCINUS
14
14
Well, my noble sir, arrest me and take me off to the general as a pirate or a rogue who tipped you overboard and made such a wreck of her—and that on shore on the road from Piraeus to town. But look, I’ll make amends for my mistake: take here and now, if you will, five ships better and bigger than the Egyptian and, best of all, unsinkable. Let them bring perhaps five times the cargo of corn from Egypt every year, even if, most glorious of shipowners, you then become unbearable to us, as you clearly will. When you still owned this one ship you couldn’t hear our shouts, and if you get five more, all three-masters and indestructible too, you’ll obviously not even see your friends. A good voyage to you, good friend! We shall sit in Piraeus and ask new arrivals from Egypt or Italy if anyone has seen Adimantus’s big ship the “Isis” anywhere.
15
ADIMANTUS You see? That’s why I hesitated to tell you what I was thinking. I knew that you would laugh and make fun of my wish. So I’ll stay with you a little until you go on, and then sail away again on my ship. It’s much better to talk to sailors than be laughed at by you. LYCINUS Don’t do that. We’ll stay too and go on board with you. ADIMANTUS Then I shall go on board first and pull up the gangway. LYCINUS Well, we shall swim to you. Surely you don’t imagine that it’s easy for you to get ships of that size without buying or building them, while we will not ask the gods to grant us the power to swim many miles without getting tired? Besides, two days ago we sailed over to Aegina to the rites of Our Lady of the Crossroads, Enodia, Hecate. you know, in a little boat, all friends together at four obols each. You didn’t object at all to our sailing with you. But now do you resent our going on board with you, and are you embarking first and taking the gangplank away? You’re too full of beans, Adimantus, and you don’t spit in your bosom, Against bad luck. and you don’t remember who you are, you shipowner. You’re so elated with your house, well situated as regards the city, and your crowd of retainers. But, my good friend, in the name of Isis remember to bring us those delicate pickled Nile fish from Egypt, perfume from Canopus, or an ibis from Memphis, and one of the Pyramids—if the ship can carry it.
16
16
TIMOLAUS
16
16
That’s enough joking, Lycinus. Look how you’ve made Adimantus blush and overwhelmed his ship in a flood of laughter so that she’s waterlogged and can’t keep the sea out any more. Now we’ve still some way to go to the city, so let us divide the journey into four, and each of us in his allotted furlongs ask the gods for whatever he wants. In this way we shan’t notice the journey and at the same time we shall enjoy ourselves with a pleasant dream of our own choosing to bless us as long as we desire. Each one may decide the measure of his wish, and the gods may be supposed to grant it all, even if it is in essence improbable. Best of all it will show who would use his wealth and wish best, for it will show what sort of a man he would have been if he had been rich.
17
SAMIPPUS Good, Timolaus. I agree. When the time comes I shall wish for what I want. I don’t think we need even ask Adimantus if he is willing—he has one foot in the ship as it is. But Lycinus must agree. LYCINUS Well, if it’s better so let us be rich. I’m not going to be envious amid your universal good-fortune. ADIMANTUS Well, who’ll be first? LYCINUS You, Adimantus; then, after you, Samippus here; then Timolaus. I’ll take about the last half-furlong before the Dipylon for my wish, even though I run through it as quickly as I can.
18
ADIMANTUS Well, I shan’t desert my ship even now. Indeed I’ll add to my prayer since I’m allowed. May Hermes Lord of Profit give his consent to all! May the ship and all in her be mine—cargo, merchants, women, sailors, and every sweetest treasure in the world! SAMIPPUS You’ve forgotten something that you have on board. ADIMANTUS You mean the boy, Samippus, the one with long hair. May he be mine too! And let her cargo of wheat be changed entirely to minted gold, all darics.
19
LYCINUS What’s this, Adimantus? Your ship will sink. The weight of wheat and an equivalent volume of gold is not the same. ADIMANTUS Don’t grudge it, Lycinus. When you come to your wish, make Parnes there, if you want, all of gold and have it so. I shan’t say a word. LYCINUS I was thinking of your own safety, to avoid the loss of all hands with the gold. Indeed your prayer is moderate, but your pretty boy, poor wretch, will drown, not knowing how to swim. TIMOLAUS Cheer up, Lycinus. The dolphins will swim up under him and carry him to shore. A lyre-player Arion. was saved by them and received the reward of his song, and the body of another boy Melicertes. was taken in the same way to the Isthmus on a dolphin’s back, so do you think Adimantus’s newly-bought servant will be in want of a loving dolphin? ADIMANTUS You’re copying Lycinus, Timolaus. You’re piling up the quips. It was your idea, you know.
20
TIMOLAUS Better make it more credible and find some treasure under your bed. Then you won’t have trouble in transferring the gold from the ship to Athens. ADIMANTUS You’re quite right. Let treasure be dug up under the stone Hermes that’s in my court, a thousand bushels of minted gold. Then immediately a house, as Hesiod says, Works and Days, 405. first, that I may be housed most splendidly. I have already bought up all the land round the Acropolis, except for the thyme and stones, and the sea-front at Eleusis, and a few acres round the Isthmus for the games, in case I want to see them there, and the plain of Sicyon. In short every thickly-shaded, well-watered, or fruitful spot in Greece will soon belong to Adimantus. Let us have gold plate to eat from, and goblets—not light-weight pieces like those of Echecrates, but two talents each in weight.
21
LYCINUS Then how will the cup-bearer serve a full goblet as heavy as that? And how will you take it from him without an effort? It won’t be a cup he offers, but a weight as heavy as Sisyphus’s rock! Sisyphus was condemned to roll a rock up to the top of a hill, from where it eternally rolls back again. ADIMANTUS Man, don’t pick my wish to pieces. I’ll make my tables of solid gold too and my couches of gold and, if you don’t keep quiet, my servants as well. LYCINUS Take care you don’t become a Midas and have your bread and drink turned to gold, and wretched in your riches perish, destroyed by a famine of superabundance.
22
22
ADIMANTUS
22
22
You’ll arrange your affairs more convincingly, Lycinus, when you make your requests in a moment. To go on, my dress will be of purple and my life the height of luxury, my sleep the sweetest possible. Friends will come and ask for favours and they’ll all bow down and grovel. Some of them will be walking up and down by my doors from dawn, among them Cleaenetus and Democritus, those great men, and, when they come and demand to be let in first, seven porters will stand there, tall barbarians, who will slam the door right in their faces, as they now do themselves. When I think fit I shall look out, like the rising sun. Some of them I shall not even look at, but if there is a poor man there, as I was before my treasure, I shall show him favour and bid him bathe and come back to dinner at the right time. But the others, the rich, will choke with envy when they see my carriages and horses and pretty slave-boys, two thousand of them, the flower of every age.
23
23
ADIMANTUS
23
23
Then dinners on gold—silver is cheap and unworthy of me—a pickled fish from Spain, wine from Italy, oil from Spain, as well, our own fresh Attic honey, meat from all parts—boar, and hare, and a variety of game-birds: a pheasant from Phasis, a peacock from India, and a guinea cock: and my several cooks will be experts in sweetmeats and sauces. If I demand a cup or a bowl and pledge a guest, let him drink and take the cup away with him.
24
24
ADIMANTUS
24
24
The rich men of today are clearly all Iruses
24
1
24
compared to me. Dionicus will never again show his little silver platter or cup in the procession, especially when he sees that my servants use so much silver. For the city this would be my allocation: by way of doles, a hundred drachmas to every citizen per month, half of this to a resident alien; and for the general public theatres and baths to beautify the city; the sea brought up to the Dipylon and a harbour in that region with water brought up by a deep canal, so that my ship may anchor near by in full view of the Ceramicus.
25
25
ADIMANTUS
25
25
For you, my friends, I’d have told the steward to make an allotment of minted gold: twenty bushels for Samippus, five quarts for Timolaus, and one quart for Lycinus levelled off with a strickle at that, because he’s a babbler and makes fun of my prayer. This is the life I wish to live, extravagant in wealth and luxury, enjoying every pleasure in fullest measure. I have spoken, and may Hermes bring it to fulfilment!
26
LYCINUS Do you know, Adimantus, by what exceedingly thin thread all this wealth is hanging? If it snaps, then all is gone and your treasure will be ashes. Proverbial. ADIMANTUS What do you mean, Lycinus? LYCINUS That, my fine friend, you don’t know how long you will live with your wealth. Who knows that when your golden table is beside you, before you can put out your hand and sample the peacock or your guinea cock, you will not breathe out your little bit of soul and be gone, leaving all that for vultures and ravens? Would you like me to run through for you those who died at once before they had a chance to enjoy their wealth, or some who even though they lived on were robbed of what they had by some spirit malignant in such matters? You have heard, I suppose, of Croesus and Polycrates who became much richer than you and lost all their good things in a moment.
27
LYCINUS But, to let them go, do you think that you will have sure and certain good health? Don’t you see that many rich men live unhappy lives through some affliction—some unable even to walk, some blind, some with internal trouble? You would not accept twice the wealth if the effeminacy of the wealthy Phanomachus went with it, I’m sure, even if you deny it. I say nothing of the plots and robberies and envy and hatred by the mob that go with riches. Do you see how much trouble your treasure causes? ADIMANTUS You’re always against me, Lycinus. Very well, you won’t get even a quart, as you’ve abused my wish to the end. LYCINUS There you are. Just like most rich men, backing out and calling off your promises. Now give us your wish, Samippus.
28
28
SAMIPPUS
28
28
I’m from the mainland, an Arcadian from Mantinea as you know, so I shan’t ask for a ship. I could not show it off to my fellow-citizens, and I shan’t be niggardly with the gods and ask for treasure and measured gold. The gods can do anything, even what seems to be quite stupendous, and the rule of wish which Timolaus laid down was not to hesitate to ask for anything, on the assumption that they will not say no. Well, I ask to be made a king, but not a king like Alexander, Philip’s son, or Ptolemy or Mithridates or any of those who inherited their kingdom from a father. No, let me begin as a brigand with about thirty sworn companions, men absolutely trustworthy and full of spirit. Then let them grow by degrees to three hundred, a thousand, and soon ten thousand, until the total is some fifty thousand heavy infantry and about five thousand horse.
29
SAMIPPUS I shall be elected chief by all, because they think me the most able leader and administrator. This very fact is sweet—to be greater than other kings, because I’ve been elected commander by the army on merit, and not inherited the kingdom after someone else has done the work—that would be like Adimantus’s treasure and not so gratifying as when you see that you have won power by your own effort. LYCINUS Goodness, Samippus! This is no small demand. You’ve asked for the essence of every good there is, to have fifty thousand men choose you as most able to command a force like that. What a wonderful king and general Mantinea had bred and didn’t know it! Never mind! Be king and lead your soldiers and muster your cavalry and your heroic shield-bearers. I want to know where you are going with an army of that size from Arcadia and who will be your first unhappy victims.
30
SAMIPPUS Listen, Lycinus, or better still come with us if you like. I’ll make you a cavalry officer in the fifty thousand. LYCINUS Well, I’m grateful for the honour, your majesty. I bow my head in Persian style and do obeisance sweeping my hands behind me, honouring your upright turban and your diadem. But make one of these mighty men your cavalry officer. I’m dreadfully bad at horses and never sat on a horse in my life before. I’m afraid that when the trumpet blows for action I’ll fall off and be trampled on by all those hooves in the throng; or the horse may be spirited and take the bit between its teeth and carry me right among the enemy; or I shall have to be tied to the saddle if I’m going to stay up and hold the reins.
31
ADIMANTUS I’ll lead your cavalry, Samippus. Let Lycinus have the right wing. I deserve the best from you in return for all those bushels of minted gold I gave you. SAMIPPUS Let us ask the cavalry personally, Adimantus, if they will have you as commander. Gentlemen of the cavalry, those in favour of Adimantus as cavalry officer, raise your hands. ADIMANTUS They’ve voted unanimously, you see, Samippus. SAMIPPUS Well, you command the cavalry and let Lycinus have the right. Timolaus here shall take the left. I shall be in the centre as the law lays down for Persian kings when they are with their troops.
32
32
SAMIPPUS
32
32
Let us now advance to Corinth over the hills after a prayer to Royal Zeus; and when we have conquered all of Greece—we shall have no opposition to our enormous numbers and have an easy victory—we shall embark on triremes, putting the cavalry on horse-transports—enough corn and sufficient boats and everything else is ready at Cenchreae—let us cross the Aegean to Ionia. There let us sacrifice to Artemis and capture the cities easily—they are unwalled—leave governors behind, and press on to Syria through Caria first, then Lycia, Pamphylia, Pisidia, Cilicia (both coast and hill areas), until we reach the Euphrates.
33
LYCINUS Please, your Majesty, leave me behind as satrap of Greece. I’m a coward and I couldn’t bear to go far away from things at home. You seem to be pushing on to the Armenians and Parthians, warlike nations, good shots with the bow. So give the right wing to someone else and leave me in Greece like an Antipater. Alexander left him in Macedon. I don’t want anyone to stick me with an arrow hitting some exposed part of my poor body when I’m leading your phalanx near Susa or Bactra. SAMIPPUS You’re deserting the levy, Lycinus, you coward. It’s the law to cut the head off anyone seen leaving the ranks. But now that we are at the Euphrates, the river has been bridged and all is safe in the rear and I’ve put prefects over each tribe to keep control of everything. Others meanwhile will go off for us to win over Phoenicia and Palestine and afterwards Egypt too.
34
34
SAMIPPUS
34
34
You cross first, Lycinus, with the right wing, then I, and Timolaus after me; last of all, Adimantus, bring the cavalry. Throughout Mesopotamia not an enemy has met us. They surrendered themselves and their strongholds quite voluntarily. We came against Babylon unexpectedly and entered the walls and held the city. The King was busy at Ctesiphon when he heard of our approach. Then he came to Seleucia, and is summoning and making ready all the cavalry he can and bowmen and slingers. The scouts report about a million already mustered under arms, including two hundred thousand mounted archers. Yet the Armenians are not yet here nor those from the Caspian Sea nor the men from Bactra, only those from near at hand and the suburbs of the empire. See how easily he mustered all those thousands. Now it’s time for us to consider what to do next.
35
ADIMANTUS I say you infantry must be off on the road to Ctesiphon while we cavalry stay here to guard Babylon. SAMIPPUS Are you playing the coward too, Adimantus, now you’re close to danger? What do you think, Timolaus? TIMOLAUS March against the enemy with your entire army and don’t wait until the arrival of allies from all around makes them better prepared. No, let us attack the enemy while they are still on the march. SAMIPPUS Good! What’s your opinion, Lycinus? LYCINUS I will tell you. We are tired with our hard travelling to Piraeus this morning, and now we have already done thirty stades I suppose, and the sun is hot—it’s about midday. Let’s go over to the olives and sit on that overturned stone there and have a breather. Then when we’re recovered we complete the rest of the way to the city. SAMIPPUS Bless you! Do you think you are still at Athens? You’re stationed on the plain near Babylon outside the walls, one of a mighty army, in a council of war. LYCINUS Thanks for the reminder. I thought I was sober and that the idea I was expressing was wideawake.
36
36
SAMIPPUS
36
36
We’ll go on then, if you don’t mind. Be good soldiers in danger and don’t betray our native spirit! The enemy are coming on now, I fancy. So let Enyalius
36
1
36
be our watchword! When the trumpeter gives the signal, raise the battle-cry, crash your spears against your shields, charge and get to grips with ’em! Get under their arrows! Don’t let them shoot us down at long range! Now we’re at close quarters and Timolaus and the left have routed those against them—Medes they are. There’s no
36
decision yet in my sector—they’re Persians here and the king’s with them. All the barbarian horse are charging our right. So show your quality, Lycinus, and encourage your men to receive the charge!
37
LYCINUS Oh, what luck! All the cavalry are charging against me, and they’ve thought me alone worth attacking. Well, if they press me hard, I fancy I shall desert and run away to the gymnasium and leave you behind still fighting your war. SAMIPPUS Don’t do that! You are already mastering them on your side. Now, as you see, I am going to fight the king in single combat. He is challenging me, and to refuse would be absolutely disgraceful. LYCINUS Yes, and you’ll be wounded by him in a moment. It’s a royal privilege to be wounded fighting for your empire. SAMIPPUS You are right. Still, it’s only a slight wound and not in an exposed place, so the scar won’t disfigure me afterwards. But did you see how I charged him and ran him through and his horse too with one throw of my spear, and then cut off his head and stripped him of his diadem and now I am the Great King with everyone doing obeisance? Let the barbarians do obeisance!
38
38
SAMIPPUS
38
38
You I’ll rule in Greek manner under the title of sole commander. Then think how many cities I shall found and name after myself, and how many I shall storm and destroy that have been insolent to my empire! Of all men I’ll punish that rich Cydias in particular: he used to be my neighbour; he encroached on my property little by little and drove me from my land.
39
LYCINUS That’s enough, Samippus. Now you’ve won your big fight it’s time for your victory-feast in Babylon—I think your empire is six stades long. It is the turn of Timolaus now to wish for whatever he wants. SAMIPPUS Well, but, Lycinus, what do you think of my wish? LYCINUS Much more laborious and violent, most glorious Majesty, than Adimantus’s. He lived in luxury and bestowed on his fellow-drinkers golden cups of two talents weight each. You were wounded in single combat and were afraid and anxious night and day—you had not only your enemies to fear, but thousands of plots and envy from those around you and hatred and flattery: not one true friend did you have, but all feigned goodwill for fear or hope. You had not even a phantom enjoyment of your pleasures, only the appearance, purple embroidered with gold, a white ribbon on your brow, and bodyguards to go before you, but otherwise intolerable hardship and much unpleasantness. Then you must do business with missions from your enemies or pass judgments or send instructions to your subjects; some tribe has revolted or some foreign state is invading. You must fear and suspect everything, and in fine everyone will count you happy except your own self.
40
40
LYCINUS
40
40
Besides, it is humiliating that sickness will come to you as to ordinary folk and fever will not set you apart as a king: Death has no fear of your bodyguard, but comes when he will and takes you moaning with no respect for your diadem. From what a height you will fall when, jerked from your royal throne, you depart by the same road as the common crowd, all equal as you are driven in the herd of the dead. Above ground you will leave behind a high mound and a lofty tombstone or a pyramid with inscribed corners, honours too late for you to see. Those statues and temples which cities erect to flatter you, and your great name, all will soon disappear unnoticed and be gone, neglected. But if all remains as long as may be, what enjoyment will now come to one who is beyond feeling? Do you see what further troubles you will have in life from fear, anxiety, and labour, and what will remain with you after you depart?
41
LYCINUS But now it’s your turn to make your request, Timolaus. See that you outdo them—as we expect from an intelligent man of the world. TIMOLAUS Well, Lycinus, see if my wish will be open to censure or possible correction. Gold, treasures and bushels of coin, kingdoms, wars and fears for empire you have rightly censured—I shall not ask for them. They are insecure, full of plots and give more grief than pleasure.
42
42
TIMOLAUS
42
42
I want Hermes to meet me and give me a set of rings with certain powers: one is to keep the body always strong and healthy, invulnerable and free from disease, another to make the wearer invisible like the ring of Gyges,
42
1
42
a third to make me stronger than thousands of men and able easily to carry by myself a weight that thousands together could hardly move, and another to lift me flying far above the earth—let me have a ring for this as well. Then a ring to put anyone I want to sleep and open every door as I approach, releasing bolts and bars—let one ring do both.
43
43
TIMOLAUS
43
43
But in particular let me have one more, the most delightful of all, one that when I wear it will make the pretty boys and women and whole peoples fall in love with me—no one will fail to love me and think me desirable: I shall be on every tongue. Many women will hang themselves in despair, boys will be mad for me and think themselves blessed if I but glance at one of them, and pine away for grief if I ignore them. Just let me be better than Hyacinthus or Hylas or Phaon the Chian.
43
1
44
44
TIMOLAUS
44
44
All these let me have and not for a short time: for I shall not live the measure of human life but for a thousand years, renewing my youth and always casting off old age about every seventeen years, as a snake sloughs its skin. While I have all this I shall want for nothing: all that others own would be mine as long as I could open doors, put watchmen to sleep, and pass in myself unseen. Whatever remarkable sight there were in India or beyond the North Wind, whatever precious possession, whatever dainty morsel or pleasant drink, I should not send for them, but fly there myself and enjoy them all to satiety. That winged beast the griffin or the Phoenix bird in India may be unseen by others, but I should see it: I alone would know the source of the Nile and how much of the earth is uninhabited and if people live head-downwards in the southern half of the world. Again I should know the nature of the stars and the moon and the sun itself without trouble, being insensitive to fire; sweetest pleasure of all, on the self-same day I should give Babylon the name of the Olympic victor, and after breakfast perhaps in Syria dine in Italy. If I had an enemy I could pay him out by dropping a stone on his head unseen and cracking his skull: my friends I could help by pouring gold on them as they slept. Then if there was a haughty person or a rich and bullying tyrant, I could pick him up and throw him down the cliffs twenty furlongs off. I could meet my darlings without let or hindrance: I’d go in unseen and put everyone to sleep but them alone. What a wonderful thing, aloft and out of arrow-shot, to spy on embattled armies and, if I wished, to support the vanquished and send the victors to sleep and to give victory to fugitives turned back from their flight. In a word I should make human life my plaything, all things would be mine and I would be thought by all others a god. This is the supreme bliss which cannot be destroyed or schemed against, being particularly accompanied by health in a long life.
45
TIMOLAUS What fault can you find in my wish, Lycinus? LYCINUS None, Timolaus. It isn’t safe to oppose a winged man stronger than ten thousand. But I will ask you this: did you see in all those tribes you flew over any other old man so out of his mind, carried by a little ring and able to move whole mountains with his finger-tip, loved by everyone, even though he was bald and snub-nosed? But tell me this: why cannot just one ring do all this for you? Why must you go about weighed down by such a load of rings on one finger of your left hand? There are too many, and your right hand must take its share. Yet there is one more ring you most certainly need to put on, one which will stop your fooling and wipe away all this drivel. Or perhaps a stronger dose of hellebore than usual will be adequate?
46
TIMOLAUS Well now it’s your turn to wish, Lycinus. Let us see what you who cavil against everybody else can find to ask that no one can censure or pull to pieces. LYCINUS I don’t need a wish. Look, we’ve reached the Dipylon, and our excellent Samippus is in single combat over Babylon, you, Timolaus, are breakfasting in Syria and dining in Italy, and you have used up my share of road, for which I’m grateful. Besides I should not like to be rich for a little while with dream-treasure, and then be cross when there was soon but plain barley-cake to eat. That’s what you’ll find soon when your happiness and your great wealth take wings and are gone and you have to come back from your treasures and your diadems just as you are, like sleepers awaking after a pleasant dream, and you find how different things are at home, like tragic actors who play the part of kings and for the most part starve when off the stage, although just now they were Agamemnons or Creons. So you’ll be sorry, in all probability, and displeased with things at home, especially you, Timolaus, when you suffer the fate of Icarus and your wings dissolve, and falling from heaven you must walk on earth, having lost all those rings which have slipped off your fingers. Instead of all your treasures and Babylon itself I have what is enough for me—a good laugh at the sort of thing that you have asked for, for all that you praise philosophy.