Asinaria
Choose a text
id="mobileReaderAuthor" class="mobile-reader-author" href="/authors/plautus-titus-maccius" aria-label="More works by Plautus, Titus Maccius">
—
⋯
Original / primary: Perseus Eng2
384
384
DEMAENETUS
384
Do I think so? You, whom I see as melancholy as if the dayAs if the day: He probably means the day for coming up for judgment, or else for trial. of trial had been named for you.
839.840
839.840
ARGYRIPPUS
839.840
Don’t you say that.
839.840b
839.840b
DEMAENETUS
839.840b
Don’t you be so, then I’ll not say so.
385
385
ARGYRIPPUS
385
Well then, look at me; I’m laughing.
841b
841b
DEMAENETUS
841b
I’d like that those who wish me ill would laugh thus.
386
386
ARGYRIPPUS
386
I know, indeed, father, why you now suppose to yourself that I’m sad; it is because she is by you. And really, father, by my faith, to tell you the truth, that matter does hurt me; and not for this reason, that I don’t desire for you that which you wish,
387
but because I love her; another woman, indeed, I could easily endure to be by you.
388
388
DEMAENETUS
388
But I have a fancy for this one.
846b
846b
ARGYRIPPUS
846b
Then you have what you desire; for myself, I wish for what I could desire.
389
389
DEMAENETUS
389
Submit to it this one day, since I’ve given you the power to be with her for a year, and have procured for you the command of money in your amour.
849.850
849.850
ARGYRIPPUS
849.850
Well, by doing that, you have laid me under an obligation to you.
849.850b
849.850b
DEMAENETUS
849.850b
Why then don’t you show yourself cheerful to me?
390
390
ARTEMONA
390
Prithee, do you say that my husband is carousing here, together with my son?—and that he has carried to his mistress twenty minae of silver?—and that, with the knowledge of my son, his father is perpetrating this wickedness?
391
391
A PARASITE
391
Trust me in nothing henceforth, either divine or human,
392
Artemona, if you find me untruthful in this matter.
393
393
ARTEMONA
393
Wretched then am I, who have supposed that, beyond others, my husband was sober, decent, chaste, and especially fond of his wife.
394
394
A PARASITE
394
But now, henceforth, understand that he, before all men, is a person of the smallest worth—a drunkard, a good-for-nothing fellow, unchaste, and a contemner of his own wife.
395
395
ARTEMONA
395
I’ faith, if this wasn’t true, he would never be doing the things that he is now doing.
396
396
A PARASITE
396
Upon my word, I too always hitherto took him to be a decent person; but by this action he declares himself,—to be carousing, indeed, together with his son, and, a decrepit old man, toying with a mistress in his company.
397
397
ARTEMONA
397
For this it is, i’ faith, that he’s going out to dinner every day.
398
He says that he’s going to Archidemus, Chereas, Chaerestratus, Clinius, Chremes, Cratinus, Dinias, Demosthenes: while he’s thinking of debauchery, and public dens of infamy with his harlot.
399
399
A PARASITE
399
Why don’t you bid your maid-servants carry him off home upon their shoulders?
400
400
ARTEMONA
400
Do you only be quiet. By my troth, I’ll surely give him some trouble.
869b
869b
A PARASITE
869b
I’m sure of it, that so it will befall him, so long, indeed, as you shall continue married to him.
870b
870b
ARTEMONA
870b
I was fancying that this fellow was still giving attendance either in the senate or to his dependants: that for that reason it was, that, worn out with fatigue, he snored the whole night through. Wearied with his labours out of doors he comes home at night. Another’s farm he ploughs, his own he leaves untilled.
401
Both he himself is corrupted, and he corrupts his son as well.
402
402
A PARASITE
402
Do you only follow me this way, I’ll make you just now to fall upon the man himself in the very fact.
403
403
ARTEMONA
403
By heaven, there’s nothing that I could more wish for.
877b
877b
A PARASITE
877b
Just stop there.
877c
877c
ARTEMONA
877c
What’s the matter?
404
404
A PARASITE
404
If perchance you were to see your husband reclining, if you beheld him with a garland on, caressing a mistress, could you recognize him?
405
405
ARTEMONA
405
I’ troth, I could.
880b
880b
A PARASITE
880b
Then there’s your man.
880c
880c
ARTEMONA
880c
I’m undone.
880d
880d
A PARASITE
880d
Stay a little. Let’s observe in private, from ambush, what business they are about.
406
406
ARGYRIPPUS
406
What end will you put to your caresses, father?
882b
882b
DEMAENETUS
882b
I confess, my son—
407
407
ARGYRIPPUS
407
What do you confess?
883b
883b
DEMAENETUS
883b
That I’m utterly undone with love for her.
408
408
A PARASITE
408
Do you hear what he says?
884b
884b
ARTEMONA
884b
I hear.
884c
884c
DEMAENETUS
884c
Ought I not to filch the mantle from my wife at home,
409
which she is so fond of, and bring it to you? Though my wife’s life should last a whole year in consequence, by my troth I could not be dissuaded from doing so.
410
410
A PARASITE
410
Do you suppose that he has been accustomed to frequent a brothel to-day for the first time?
411
411
ARTEMONA
411
Upon my faith, it was he that was pilfering me; whereas I was suspecting my maid-servants, and was tormenting the wretched creatures who were innocent all the while.
889b
889b
ARGYRIPPUS
889b
Father,
412
bid him pour out some wine; ’tis a long time since I drank firstSince I drank first: They probably took the first draught each in his turn. Argyrippus tells his father that he is dry, and that it is a long time since he had the first draught..
413
413
DEMAENETUS
413
Begin, boy, from the topFrom the top: We are to suppose that the three are reclining or one triclinium, or couch. Argyrippus lies at the top, his father below him, and Philenium the lowest, with her head reclining on the old man’s breast.. (To PHILENIUM.) Come, do you meanwhile from below give me a kiss.
414
414
ARTEMONA
414
Wretch that I am, I’m undone! How the villain, the garnishing of a bierOf a bier: Capulus was another name of the lectica or feretrum, on which the corpse was carried to the funeral pile. In the case of rich people, the capuli were sometimes made of ivory, and covered with gold and purple., is kissing away.
415
415
DEMAENETUS
415
A breath, by my faith, somewhat sweeter than that of my wife.
416
416
PHILENIUM
416
Tell me, there’s a dear, does the breath of your wife smell bad?
894b
894b
DEMAENETUS
894b
I’d prefer to drink bilge-water, if it were necessary, rather than kiss her.
417
417
ARTEMONA
417
Aye, pray, how say you? By my troth, to your own great detriment, you’ve surely said that against me. Never mind; only de you come home, I’ll let you know what danger there is in speaking abusively against a wife with a dowry.
418
418
PHILENIUM
418
By heavens, you are a wretch.
899b
899b
ARTEMONA
899b
I’ faith, he’s deserving so to be.
899c
899c
ARGYRIPPUS
899c
How say you, father?
419
Don’t you love my mother?
900b
900b
DEMAENETUS
900b
Who—I? I love her just now, because she isn’t present.
420
420
ARGYRIPPUS
420
How, when she is present?
901b
901b
DEMAENETUS
901b
Then, I wish she was dead.
901c
901c
A PARASITE
901c
This fellow is fond of you, according to what he says.
421
421
ARTEMONA
421
On my word, he’s surely laying out all this at interest; for if, this day, he returns home, I’ll especially have my revenge in kissing him.
422
422
ARGYRIPPUS
422
Father, throw the dice; that afterwards I may have a throw.
904b
904b
DEMAENETUS
904b
By all means.
423
You, Philenium, for myself, and death for my wife. (He throws.) ’Tis Venus’s castVenus’s, cast: Venereus jactus was the best throw on the set of four tali, or knuckle-bone dice, used by the ancients. It is supposed to have been a combination of the numbers, the sum of which was fourteen. When trying to throw the Venereus jactus, it was usual to mention the name of the mistress of the thrower; and Demaenetus throws in death to his wife, by way of supplement. From the next line, he appears to have been successful in his throw.. Lads, clap your hands, and give me some honeyed wine in my cup, in honor of my throw.
424
424
ARTEMONA
424
I can hold out no longer.
907b
907b
A PARASITE
907b
If you haven’t learned the fulling tradeHaven’t learned the fulling trade: He intends a pun here upon the word durare, which meant either to endure, bear, or hold out; as also to full, harden, or thicken cloth, by the fuller’s art. Artemona says that she cannot durare in the first sense; on which the Parasite quibbles, and says, Because you have not learnt the fulling art. In the next line also a ploy upon words is intended, as invadi in oculos may mean either present yourself before his eyes or attack his eyes, and claw them out. No doubt the Parasite would have relished the fun, if she had taken his advice in the latter sense., it’s not to be wondered at; now it’s quite fitting for you to beset his eyes. (They make their appearance before the revellers.)
425
425
ARTEMONA
425
By heavens, I will live, and you this day have made that invocation to your own great misfortune.
910b
910b
A PARASITE
910b
Will some one run to fetch the undertakersThe undertaker: The pollinctores were slaves, who belonged to the libitinarii, or undertakers, and whose duty it was to anoint the body with oil and perfumes before it was burnt.?
426
426
ARGYRIPPUS
426
Health to you, mother.
911b
911b
ARTEMONA
911b
Health indeed after this fashion!
911c
911c
A PARASITE
911c
Demaenetus is dead. ’Tis time to betake myself hence: this battle bravely waxes hot. I’ll be off to Diabolus. I’ll tell him his orders are performed as he desired them; and in the meantime I’ll persuade him that we should take a meal, while these people are squabbling.
427
Afterwards, in fine, I’ll bring him here to-morrow, to the procuress, that he may give her the twenty mince, that, in his turn, he in his passion may be enabled to obtain this damsel. I hope that Argyrippus will be able to be prevailed upon to allow him to pass each alternate night with him in her company; for, unless I obtain that, I’ve lost my patronMy patron: Regem. Literally, my king; the name which Parasites bestowed upon their patrons.; so great is the passion of the man by reason of his love.
428
428
ARTEMONA
428
What business have you to give a retreat here in your house to my husband?
920b
920b
PHILENIUM
920b
Troth, he really will this day be the death of wretched me, through sheer disgust.
921b
921b
ARTEMONA
921b
Rise, wencher, be off home.
429
429
DEMAENETUS
429
I’m undone.
922b
922b
ARTEMONA
922b
Yes, you areYes, you are: He says, nullus sum, in the sense of I’m undone; but she chooses to take it as though he had meant I am a worthless fellow, which meaning these words are capable of bearing.; don’t, i’ faith, gainsay it, you most vile of all men. Why, the cuckoo’s still on his nestCuckoo’s still on his nest: The cuckoo takes possession of the nests of other birds. and lays its eggs there. Artemona probably alludes to that fact, on seeing her husband under such a disgraceful circumstances.. Rise, wencher, be off home.
430
430
DEMAENETUS
430
Woe to me!
924b
924b
ARTEMONA
924b
You prophesy correctly. Rise, wencher, be off home.
431
431
DEMAENETUS
431
Step a little this way then.
925b
925b
ARTEMONA
925b
Rise, wencher, be off home.
432
432
DEMAENETUS
432
Now, prithee, wife—
926b
926b
ARTEMONA
926b
Do you remember now that I’m your wife? It was but just now, when you were heaping abuse upon me, that I wasn’t your wife.
433
433
DEMAENETUS
433
I’m utterly ruined.
928b
928b
ARTEMONA
928b
Why, pray? Does the breath of your wife smell strong?
434
434
DEMAENETUS
434
It smells of myrrh.
929b
929b
ARTEMONA
929b
Have you filched my mantle then to be giving to your harlot?
435
435
ARGYRIPPUS
435
By the powers—what, did he promise that he would filch your mantle?
436
436
ARTEMONA
436
Won’t you hold your tongue?
931b
931b
ARGYRIPPUS
931b
I was going to dissuade him, mother.
931c
931c
ARTEMONA
931c
A pretty son! (To DEMAENETUS.) Is it proper for a father to teach these morals to his children? Are you ashamed of nothing?
933b
933b
DEMAENETUS
933b
I’ faith, if there’s nothing else, I’m ashamed of you, wife.
437
437
ARTEMONA
437
With your hoary head, your wife is dragging you, you cuckoo, from dens of infamy.
438
438
DEMAENETUS
438
The dinner’s cooking; mayn’t I stop, only to take my dinner?
439
439
ARTEMONA
439
Faith, you’ll dine to-day on a heavy mishap, as you deserve.
440
440
DEMAENETUS
440
I shall repose but uncomfortably; my wife is taking me home condemned.
441
441
ARGYRIPPUS
441
I told you, father, not to devise ill against my mother.
442
442
PHILENIUM
442
Do remember about the mantleAbout the mantle: This she says by way of farewell banter to the old fellow, whom she is too happy to get rid of., there’s a dear.
939b
939b
DEMAENETUS
939b
Won’t you order her to go away from here?