Bacchides
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Original / primary: Perseus Eng2
494
494
PHILOXENUS
494
The more I revolve it in my breast, what disturbances my son has raised, into what a course of life, and into what habits he unwittingly has headlong plunged himself, the greater is my concern, and the more do I dread lest he may be ruined or corrupted. I know it; I once was of the same age, and I did all these things; but in a quiet way.
495
I was gay, I had my mistress, I drank, I feasted, I made presents, but still it was seldom I did so. The methods, too, please me not which I see parents in general employ towards their sons. I have determined to give some latitude to my son, that he may have some scope for his inclinations. I think that’s right; but still, I don’t wish him to give way too much to sloth and wantonness. Now I’m going to Mnesilochus,
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to see whether, as I requested, by his endeavours he has turned him for me to virtue and to sobriety; as, indeed, I am sure he has done if he has met him, of such a disposition is he by nature.
496
496
NICOBULUS
496
Whoever there are in any place whatsoever, whoever have been, and whoever shall be, in time to come, fools, blockheads, idiots, dolts, sots, oafs, lubbersOafs, lubbers: Blennus means, properly, dirty-nosed, and thence a driveller, an idiot. Bucco was one who had large puffed-out cheeks, which was considered to be the mark of a blockhead or foot., I singly by far exceed them all in folly and absurd ways.
497
I’m undone. I’m ashamed of myself; that I at this time of life should disgracefully have been twice made a fool of! The more I think of this confusion which my son has made, the more am I incensed. I’m ruined, and I’m utterly destroyed; I’m distracted in every possible way. All plagues harass me, by all modes of death do I perish. This day has Chrysalus rent me in pieces; Chrysalus has plundered wretched me;
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he, the villain, by his clever tricks, has shaved, to the very quick, simple me, just as he has pleased. For the Captain says that she is a Courtezan, whom that fellow said was his wife; and he has informed me of everything, as each particular happened; how that she had been hired by him for this year; how that that much gold was left to be repaidLeft to be repaid: This passage is rather obscure; but it seems to mean that Bacchis had been engaged for a year by the Captain, and that having received the whole sum when the original agreement was made, she had arranged to repay the Captain a sum proportionate to the time that was wanting to complete the year engaged for., which I, most simple man, had promised him. ’Tis this, this, I say, through which my breast boils with indignationBoils with indignation.: Peracescit. Literally, turns sour.; ’tis this, in fine, by which I am distracted;
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that I, at my time of life, should be made a fool of, aye, by Heaven, so made a very sport of, and with my hoary head and white beard, that wretched I should be bamboozled out of my gold. Undone am I, inasmuch as this slave of mine has dared in this way to set not the value of a nutshell upon me. And I—if any other way I had lost a greater sum—I should have taken it less amiss, and have deemed it less of a loss to me.
500
500
PHILOXENUS
500
For sure, some person, I know not who, seems to be talking near to me. But who’s this I see?
501
Really, ’tis the father of Mnesilochus.
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1105b
NICOBULUS
1105b
Hah! I see a partner in affliction. Save you, Philoxenus!
1106b
1106b
PHILOXENUS
1106b
And you; whence are you betaking yourself?
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1106c
NICOBULUS
1106c
From a place whence comes a wretched and a luckless mortal.
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502
PHILOXENUS
502
Why, troth, I’m surely on the earth, the spot where it befits a wretched and a luckless mortal to be.
503
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NICOBULUS
503
We now, as we are of like age, are meeting with similar fortunes.
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1108b
PHILOXENUS
1108b
So it is. But as to yourself, what’s the matter with you?
1109b
1109b
NICOBULUS
1109b
I’ faith, mine’s the same mishap as your own.
504
504
PHILOXENUS
504
Does this misfortune in any way relate to your son?
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505
NICOBULUS
505
Such is the fact.
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PHILOXENUS
1111b
The same disease exists in my own breast.
506
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NICOBULUS
506
Aye, and that very worthy fellow, Chrysalus, has been ruining my son, myself, and all my fortunes.
507
507
PHILOXENUS
507
Pray now, what is this mishap of yours about your son?
1114b
1114b
NICOBULUS
1114b
You shall know:
508
together with your own son he’s undone; both of them are keeping mistresses alike.
509
509
PHILOXENUS
509
How do you know?
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1116b
NICOBULUS
1116b
I have seen them.
1116c
1116c
PHILOXENUS
1116c
Ah! wretch that I am! I’m ruined outright.
510
510
NICOBULUS
510
Why do we hesitate a moment to knock and to call them both hither out of doors.
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511
PHILOXENUS
511
I don’t object.
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NICOBULUS
1118b
Hallo there! Bacchis! Bid the door to be opened this instant, if you please, unless you had rather the door and the posts be knocked to bits with hatchets.
512
512
1st BACCHIS
512
Who is it that calls out my name with such a noise and tumult, and is knocking so hard at the door?
513
513
NICOBULUS
513
I and this person here.
1121b
1121b
1st BACCHIS
1121b
Pray, what’s the matter now? Who has been driving these sheepDriving these sheep: She calls them sheep, probably, because of their venerable appearance; though she afterwards remarks that they are but dirty sheep. Perhaps, too, it was the custom among ladies of this class, in cant phrase to call those sheep who could stand fleecing; a point on which it will be found in the dialogue that they exchange remarks. Goat. would have been a more appropriate name, under the circumstances for the old sinners. to us?
514
514
NICOBULUS
514
These most shocking hussies call us sheep.
1122b
1122b
2nd BACCHIS
1122b
Their shepherd’s asleep, as they come straying thus from the flock.
515
515
1st BACCHIS
515
But, i’ faith, they are not white; they both look dirty.
516
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2nd BACCHIS
516
Because they have both been shorn just now.
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1125b
PHILOXENUS
1125b
How they seem to be laughing at us.
1126b
1126b
NICOBULUS
1126b
Let them, just as long as they please.
517
517
1st BACCHIS
517
Don’t you think that these sheep are shorn three times a year?
518
518
2nd BACCHIS
518
I’ faith, to-day one of them has been already shorn twice, that’s sure.
519
519
1st BACCHIS
519
They are old and fleecelessOld and fleeceless: Mina ovis was a sheep that had no wool on its belly. It is hard to say why this name was given to it. If the word mina had signified a certain coin, and not a sum of money merely, we might have supposed it alluded to the smoothness of the coin., both of them.
1129b
1129b
2nd BACCHIS
1129b
But I think they have been in good plight once.
520
520
1st BACCHIS
520
Prithee, do you see how they are looking with a sheep’s eye at us?
521
521
2nd BACCHIS
521
By my troth, I really do believe they are without any ill design.
522
522
PHILOXENUS
522
This happens to us deservedly, for having come here.
523
523
1st BACCHIS
523
Well, let them be driven in-doors to foldBe driven in-doors to fold: Cogantur. Literally, let them be driven within. Cogor was the term applied to penning or folding sheep of cattle..
1133b
1133b
2nd BACCHIS
1133b
I don’t know what occasion there is for that, as they have neither milk nor wool. Let them stand as they are.
524
Of whatever value they have been, they are now out of date; all their fruit has fallen off them by this. Don’t you see, how, straying unattended, they are ranging about at liberty? Why, I fancy that they must be dumb with age; they don’t bleat even, though they are absent from the rest of the flock.
525
They seem both silly and worthless.
526
526
1st BACCHIS
526
Let’s return in-doors, sister.
1140b
1140b
NICOBULUS
1140b
Stay where you are, both of you; these sheep want you.
527
527
2nd BACCHIS
527
Why, surely this is a prodigy; sheep are addressing us with a human voice.
528
528
PHILOXENUS
528
These sheep will return you the heavy and great injury which they owe to you.
529
529
1st BACCHIS
529
If you owe me aught, I forgive it you; keep it to yourself; I’ll never demand it of you. But what is the reason that you are threatening mischief to us?
530
530
PHILOXENUS
530
Because they say that our two lambs are shut up here.
531
531
NICOBULUS
531
And besides those lambs, my dog is there concealed that bitesThat bites: He alludes to his having been bitten by Chrysalus.. If they are not now produced to us and sent out of the house, we shall be furious rams; we shall attack you forthwith.
532
532
1st BACCHIS
532
Sister, I have something to say to you in private.
1149b
1149b
2nd BACCHIS
1149b
How now, prithee?
1149c
1149c
NICOBULUS
1149c
Whither are they going?
533
533
FIRST BACCHIS
533
Sister, I give to you that old fellow that’s farthest off, that you may have him cleverly smoothed down; I’ll now attack this other one that’s angry; if we can only entice them here indoors.
534
534
2nd BACCHIS
534
I’ll manage my task with cleverness, although ’tis to caress an old skeleton.
535
535
1st BACCHIS
535
Take care and do your best.
1153b
1153b
2nd BACCHIS
1153b
Be quiet; do you do yours; I’ll manage what I have said.
536
536
NICOBULUS
536
Why are these two women holding a council here in private?
537
537
PHILOXENUS
537
What say you, my good fellow—?
1155b
1155b
NICOBULUS
1155b
What would you with me?
1155a
1155a
PHILOXENUS
1155a
I really am ashamed to tell you a certain thing.
538
538
NICOBULUS
538
What is it that you’re ashamed about?
1156b
1156b
PHILOXENUS
1156b
Still, as you are a person, a friend of mine, I’m determined to entrust you with what I could wish. (Whispers.) I’m good for nought.
1157b
1157b
NICOBULUS
1157b
I’ve known that this long time; but tell me why you’re good for nought?
539
539
PHILOXENUS
539
I’ve been terribly touched with birdlime: troth, my heart is pierced by the goad.
1159b
1159b
NICOBULUS
1159b
I’ faith, ’twere much better if your flanks were goaded, you worthless fellow.
540
But what is it? Although I suspect that I myself pretty well know already what it is; still, I should even like to hear it from yourself.
1161b
1161b
PHILOXENUS
1161b
Do you see that woman?
1161c
1161c
NICOBULUS
1161c
I see her.
1161d
1161d
PHILOXENUS
1161d
She’s not an uncomely person.
541
541
NICOBULUS
541
Troth, but she is decidedly uncomely; and you are a good-for-nothing fellow.
1162b
1162b
PHILOXENUS
1162b
Why more? I’m in love.
1162c
1162c
NICOBULUS
1162c
You, in love?
1162d
1162d
PHILOXENUS
1162d
’Pon honorPon honor: Ναι γάρ. This Greek phrase was, no doubt, used as a cant or off-hand mode of expression, just as on similar occasions we adopt the French oui or vraiement, yes, decidedly..
542
542
NICOBULUS
542
And do you, you rotten creature, presume to become a lover at your time of life?
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1163b
PHILOXENUS
1163b
Why not?
543
543
NICOBULUS
543
Because it’s a disgrace.
1164b
1164b
PHILOXENUS
1164b
What need of words? I am not vexed with my son, nor yet is it right you should be vexed with yours: if they are in love, they do wisely.
544
544
1st BACCHIS
544
Follow me this way.
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1166b
NICOBULUS
1166b
See, they are moving at last, these allurers and enticers to disgrace. (To the women.) How now? Do you this instant restore us our sons and my servant, or am I to try rougher means with you?
1168b
1168b
PHILOXENUS
1168b
Won’t you away with you? You surely are not a man, to address a pretty woman so rudely in that fashion.
545
545
1st BACCHIS
545
Most worthy old gentleman, by whatsoever is upon the earth, let me entreat this of you, that you will cease to attack this error with such great vehemence.
546
546
NICOBULUS
546
If you don’t away with you, although you are so handsome, I’ll be doing you some great mischief just now.
1172b
1172b
1st BACCHIS
1172b
I shall endure it; I don’t apprehend that any blow that you can give, will cause me any pain.
1173b
1173b
NICOBULUS
1173b
How smooth of speech she is. O me! I am in alarm.
1174b
1174b
1st BACCHIS
1174b
He’s more calm already.
547
(Aloud.) Step this way with me in-doors; and there, if you choose, correct your son.
548
548
NICOBULUS
548
Avaunt from me, abomination!
1176b
1176b
1st BACCHIS
1176b
Do, my love, let me prevail upon you.
1176c
1176c
NICOBULUS
1176c
You, prevail upon me?
549
549
2nd BACCHIS
549
For sure, I shall prevail, at all events, upon this gentleman.
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1177b
PHILOXENUS
1177b
Yes, I beg of you to show me in-doors.
550
550
2nd BACCHIS
550
What a dear man you are.
1178b
1178b
PHILOXENUS
1178b
But do you know on what condition you are to show me in-doors?